One of my favorite parts about living in Charleston has always been that you could bump into anyone you know, anywhere. You could walk right out of your front door and see one of your characters. It reminded me of college. That safe feeling of even when you’re by yourself, you’ll probably see a familiar face. Plus, the entertainment of texting your friends “Guess who I just saw?” never gets old....until you live in Charleston for more than a year and truly dabble in the dating world here. Then it gets a little scary.
There’s a phenomenon in this city, especially when it comes to the dating scene, that's called “you can run, but you can’t hide.” If you haven’t dated in Charleston yet, use this as your cautionary tale.
There is no escaping your past suitors in Charleston. You will run into them, and it will be when you least expect it.
It could be a week after he broke up with you, and you spot him walking along the side of Maybank Highway as you’re driving by.
It could be a few hours after a hurricane where you randomly go to Share House on a Friday night, and realize you’re standing right behind him - a man you and your friends lovingly call "Little Chico." And though you try to make yourself scarce, you accidentally bump into him and spill your full Orange Crush all over his white sneakers.
Or my personal favorite: it could be two and a half years after he ghosted you, he moves away, and you make eye contact with him from across the bar at Saltwater Cowboys. And he waves…?
Now, Charleston is a small town and we all go to most of the same places. So it is probable that yes, you can in fact see four of your past men in a one hour span of bar hopping down King Street. But it’s times like this that make me wonder if Charleston has a special curse, or if it’s just me. The other week, I was driving down East Bay Street on a Tuesday morning and I saw a man on a run up ahead. What a pleasant surprise, I used to date him! I’m driving in the lane closest to the sidewalk that he’s running on. As I’m getting closer to him, I notice the giant puddle I’m about to drive through, and it’s right next to where he’s running. You already know where this is going. I did in fact drive through that puddle, and I absolutely splashed him in a way that you only see in cartoons.
Although he was the one running and couldn’t hide in this scenario, it just goes to show that you’re truly never safe from the ghosts of your past in the Holy City.
Now, here’s the thing - this didn’t start happening to me until I let go of the idea of trying to run into them on purpose. I’ll admit it - I’m a retired schemer.
I used to plot and plan to “accidentally” run into the men around Charleston who ghosted me or ended things with me. Why? Well, let’s be real. I was delusional. I thought that if they “happened” to see me, they’d realize they made a mistake and want me back, but it never seemed to work. Let’s have a round of applause for my mental glow-up caused by therapy that knocked enough sense into me to never scheme like that again. Even so, as I’m scheme-sober, they still always find me. Is this my karma? Who’s writing the script of my life?
Whatever it may be, I’ll keep running, but I’m not too sure if I actually want to hide. Someone has to keep sending the “guess who I just saw” texts. And it might as well be me.
